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Reminiscing brought me back here.

I was wondering what happened to few years back and remember the fact that I actually had multiple blogs back in the days. I actually still have a few blogs running but they are all privatised (For my eyes only) and this is the only true blog I have. I actually still have a semi-active Tumblr account, Twitter and (gasp) Instagram which are updated almost daily and let's not forget Facebook. Other than my 8 hour daily sleep, you will definitely find me on Facebook.

Like I was saying, I was reminiscing about back in the days and checked back in this blog. And it made it sad I didn't keep it updated. Hindsight is witch. It is always telling me things I should have done and THIS (blogging) is also one of the things I should have been more active in. Actively blogging would have helped me record down what I did on a daily or weekly basis.

In fact, it would have helped me in my book writing about my 5 years in dental school. I'm pretty serious here. During my final year, I told my friends that I will record down every single horrible thing that one lecturer did to us and publish it in a book. However, that did not happen. Like most university students, the one thing that we are most concerned about is to GRADUATE. To publish blog posts about the blatant favoritism, sexism and racism that occurs in my university will most likely ensure my path to graduation will be made harder than it already is.

Now that I have graduated (but still jobless for 6 months and counting, thanks to the exponential growth of dental schools in Malaysia), I am contemplating on writing what happened. But, to no surprise, I cannot remember accurately all the drama that went on during dental school. I will not forget this particular person who made everybody's life a living hell (and then disappeared into thin air right after we graduated) but what did she actually do to make our life so difficult? I remember things like demanding perfection when it's impossible, double standard (passing someone's competency test while failing someone else who did way better) and having inconsistent demands (one day she will demand for this, another day scold us for doing things the way she wanted us to do the day before). I remember feeling down and depressed thanks to this person but what did she do to trigger all that feelings? Again, I don't remember the exact details and this is why I regret not writing or typing it down right as it happened. Back then, I figured typing it out will make me even more blue so I rather distract myself doing something rather than relieving that moment of terror.

So I guess that book is now a no go, but honestly, who would want to read about the nightmare that is dental school? Dental practitioners probably don't want to relieve the moments of feeling meek and small... Or do they? Now that I think about it, they would probably laugh at what happened during dental school. The moments when they screwed up and got a scolding by the professor who is now their best friend/colleague. The times when they had to chase requirement and competency test and had to hang on to each other for support and the things that brought friends and course mates closer together. Maybe they will think my book is a satirical/ dark humor book because they too experienced it but hey, it's over and it's good for a laugh at the expense of their juniors and future colleagues. As for another target audience, which is dental students, they will probably find it reassuring because they are not the only ones experiencing the horrors and will feel happier because someone else is having it worse than they are. Potential dental students, those who are still in high school or pre-university will probably read it, thinking they will read it to understand what they did to go through to achieve their dream job, will probably be turned off by dental school. Oh or maybe they are so optimistic they will say to themselves, HUH! SO WHAT!? I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH DENTAL SCHOOL BECAUSE I'M AWESOME AND IT WILL BE EASY PEASY! NOTHING WILL MAKE ME GIVE UP MY DREAMS TO BE AN ORTHODONTIST AND BE FILTHY RICH! and then cry themselves to sleep in their kolej kediaman 2-3 years later because their patient release airplane (fong fei kei- last minute back out) from prosthodontic clinic and their backup patient is away on a holiday.

Anyway enough of that rant. My next aim, which I have not acted upon, is to complain to a prominent newspaper about the long wait for posting. Seriously, I'm not joking when I said I have waited for 6 months and still waiting for a job in the government. JUST because our exams are one month later than most universities.

But we are not the ones who had it worst. Apparently some universities have been waiting for 1 year plus and there is still no end in sight whereas some universities who graduated later and waited for a few months got their posting already. I can feel the apprehension emanating from them, wherever they are. You got to wonder though, if the company that is suppose to control who gets the job first is not doing their job fairly (prioritising certain group of people over others), is that why certain people feel free to do things that is clearly borderline torture without regards for people's feelings?

I just wish I get my posting soon now.

(Hi future me, if you are reading this and working as a dental officer/dentist/whatever you are working as, I wonder, do you still remember what happened during dental school?)




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